I need the spray!

Richard is a "character" in my class that keeps me on my toes and thinking, "What will he say next?" Here are a few examples of today's randomness...

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Scenario #1:
We are at recess and I see Richard walking up with his arms out like Jesus and his wrists are clenched tightly.
Richard: "I NEED THE SPRAY!"
Me: "What are you talking about?"
Richard: "I AM BURNING!"
Me: "What are you talking about?"
Richard: (whispering in a pain-filled voice) "My back is sunburned."
Me: (looking at his shoulders)
Richard: (whisper again) "Other side!"
Me: "Okay, go to the nurse and get the spray."
Richard: (walks inside with his arm still stretched out and wrists clenched)

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Scenario #2
We are talking about transformations (math-->translation, rotation, reflection) and Richard was having a problem seeing the figures in the book as congruent. The key to the lesson was that the shapes had to be congruent to even be considered as a transformation.
Richard: "Ms. L, number 10 is not congruent."
Me: "I disagree. It is on a chart to show you it is congruent."
Class: "Yeah Richard...those are congruent."
Richard: "No! Look closely! This one is on the line and this one is barely right under the line. That means they aren't the same size. They aren't congruent, so they aren't any type of transformation."
Me: "No. It is on the graph paper. I see them both exactly on the line. Remember that I said if they were NOT congruent, you would be able to tell with a glance. The pictures will show a large enough difference in the size that it won't even be a doubt in your mind."
Richard: "But these aren't the same size. This one is right under the line and that one is on the line."
Me: "Richard! I promise you those are congruent shapes. They will not make the shapes a half of a millimeter smaller. It will be something you will notice immediately. You are staring at the picture too much. Look away and then look back and tell me if they are the same size."
Richard: "They aren't!!!!! This one is just a tiny tiny bit bigger than that one."
Me: "Okay! Take my word for it that they are congruent. What type of transformation is that??? Even if you don't agree that they are congruent, what transformation is it?"
Richard: "But it's not..."
Me: "Yes it is! Let's move on!"

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Scenario #3
I was doing a guided reading lesson during Explorer Time (aka intervention time), when Richard approached with something he HAD to tell me.
Richard: "Ms. L, this dice is a cheating dice." (No, he doesn't know it's called a die.)
Me: "What are you talking about?"
Richard: "This dice is a cheating dice. It only goes up to three."
Me: "I guess that's all the game needs...is three."
Richard: "But it's a cheating dice."
Me: "I still don't understand."
Richard: "If they get six, then I can only get three. It's a cheating dice."
Me: "I don't know how they will get six when the die only goes to three."
Richard: (begins walking away) "All I wanted to tell you is that this is a cheating dice. IT'S A CHEATING DICE!"
Me: "Okay."